Broadway
Ten years ago today, I graduated from Long Island City High School. The four years there were the best years of my life. That notion has only grown stronger as the decade has gone by. I didn’t realize that on the first day of school, Thursday September 9th, 1999.
LICHS was not among the six choices on my high school application. I was originally accepted to John Bowne High School and it’s agricultural science program. But the idea was quashed after finding out that it wasn’t a barrier free school and they wouldn’t be able to provide me the services I needed (Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy and Speech Therapy) and with Hillcrest High School too far away from where I live, it was LIC by default. The note my guidance counselor wrote my parents ended with “he’ll have all the help he needs and have lots of friends” but I wasn’t happy with the decision.
Freshman year began on 9/9/99 as myself and a good chunk of my friends from PS 112 and Louis Armstrong Middle School embarked on this journey together. I would flourish during the first two years, so much so that after being in Special Education for most of my life, I was placed in general education classes Junior year. There was only one problem, the timing of the transition couldn’t have been worse.
Junior year, I was in the middle of recovering from a double leg surgery on my right leg during the Summer of 2001. It would be the first taste of loneliness as several people promised they’d visit me in the hospital but didn’t at least one friend sent me a get well card and another had an excuse as she was going through surgery at the same time and one who disappeared entirely. I returned on 9/25/01, in my wheelchair, cast and with pins in three of my toes. It was a struggle that whole year balancing recovery with my school work. I had therapy at HSS twice a week that required me to stay after school to wait for my dad who was working in the Bronx at the time, picked me up at school and traveled in rush hour traffic to Manhattan. I also had a paraprofessional helping me, it was strange as I was normally self reliant having to open up yourself to another person. But as I transitioned from the wheelchair, to a walker and to a cane, the ship was steadied.
As senior year began, I was able to walk on my own two feet for the first time ever. I was so happy that I was showing everyone my leg and that there was no brace there. But I still had one goal left to ensure graduation: passing the Math A Regents. I failed it two previous times and was lined up to take the exam in January of 2003 after taking Saturday prep classes. On the Saturday before the exam, I was slated to retake the SAT’s but my dad advised me to focus on the Regents exam and go to the class that day. He was right, I did pass the exam, barely. There were two more obstacles before graduation day: getting through Economics class where the teacher was a bit of a stickler for details to the point where just because you didn’t give a full page opinion on the subject you wrote about, there would be a decrease in grade and passing the Chemistry Regents. I survived both and now saw the finish line.
Graduation Day was a hot Thursday afternoon, much like today. I left for Queens College ahead of my family as my sister was getting her diploma and saying her goodbyes and they nearly left her home. I arrived and first ran into my friend Melanie and her family outside the venue before I went inside. Inside, most of my friends were on the stage getting ready for the ceremony to begin and I ended up in the front row. When my name was called, I passed by my friends on stage as they applauded for me and I them. As the chorus began to sing The Rembrandt’s “I’ll Be There For You” which I never want to hear again ever, the terrifying notion settled in: this will be the last time I see everyone in the same place and time some friends I’ve been with since elementary school. The ceremony ended and I was looking to find any of my and I found my friend/teacher Ms.Christiano before my family found me. After a few pictures, my parents treated me to lunch at a nearby diner that we used to go to every Sunday morning as kids.
The next morning, it was time to pick up the reward for four years of triumph and struggle. Not everyone who was at Graduation the day before showed up but a good chunk of friends did. I opened the diploma cover to see the Regents Endorsed sticker as well as the words “This is to certify that Oswald Perez has completed the requirements of the high school program and has merited graduation” and felt as happy as the day my brace was taken off my leg. The joy lasted until the moment I stepped out of LICHS for the last time.
With LICHS resigned to the past, it was time to start life anew at John Jay College. It took me five years, but I graduated with my BA in Criminal Justice. But during those years, I began to keep to myself a lot. I spent free time alone exploring Manhattan. All the (mis) adventures in my life the last ten years have been an attempt to fill a gaping void left behind by the absence of my friends. I haven’t help matters any as nearly every attempt to reunite came along, I would say no. I can’t face my friends again knowing my life isn’t together.
Despite all that has happened, I’m grateful that I didn’t get my way on the decision over which high school I was going to. My friends became an extended family as the years went on. Behind this virtual wall of my own making, the memories keep me comfort. There isn’t a day that goes by that I wish the last decade didn’t happen. If only I could summon the courage to tear down the wall and see the joy that lies on the other side. I miss everyone more than can be realized. It’s times like these you learn to live again, time and time again.
